So this week's pretty much been comprised of stupid annoyances and getting ready for college touring.
I've been strongly thinking about all of my friendships with people for the past while, as I usually do so I know that everything's okay between my friends and I from my P.O.V. My friendship with J.T. popped up. Now, this was the guy that I've been convinced that I've loved for two years now, and every once in a while we have our little fallouts because he can't crawl enough out of his little hole to say "hi" to his friends every once in a while. So, I've been thinking about my friendship with him and I realized that with the exception of like one message I've been the one who's been reaching towards him for the past year. I think about what I'm supposed to do for a little while, because he can be extremely sensitive about having his flaws pointed out. By Tuesday I pretty much put a middle finger to mulling things over and send a message saying "Okay, you aren't reaching out for me nearly enough to make me happy. I get you're in college, but seriously. All I want was a little text saying 'hi' every once in a while. I'm leaving the next message up to you because I'm sick of having to maintain our relationship so much." This is in context. I also specifically state in the message that he needs to think this over for a while lest I get really pissed off. Not even an hour later I get a call from him where he pretty much screams at me for 10 minutes about how dare I send a message like that to him and he's sick of everyone from our town sending this shit to him and we have no idea what he's been through in the past month and I need to stop doing this, pretty much coming to the conclusion of "You better not do this again or else I'm out of his life." Pretty much every time I have tried to sort out a problem with him he starts screaming at me and spewing out threats of chopping me out of his life. Now he's talking about how he's decided to cut me some slack the last couple years because I have all these problems but he's just tired of me saying this over and over. He's now letting me figure out what I want for the friendship because now he doesn't care one way or another. Given by how much of an asshole he just proved himself to be, it's needless to say I don't plan on ever calling him back because whatever form of love I had for him has just been demolished.
Moving onto happier pastures, on Thursday I flew out to Chicago with my mom. She's never been to Chicago before so after our college tour we went out to Chinatown for some lunch. We ended up eating at this fabulous restaurant called Great Taste and drinking some bubble tea. We've quickly came to the conclusion that bubble tea is great but you get sick of drinking it after a while. After that we hit up the Hershey's factory which was incredible. They didn't show the process of making the chocolate but there was this massive funnel in the middle of the store that if you pull a bunch of levers and spin wheels the candy will come flying down the funnels and into your bucket of sugar. It was amazing! We then went onto the Skydeck and got an incredible view of the Midwest. I'm not kidding when I say Midwest; the view from the top floor enables you to see into four different states on a clear day. It was clear enough there that we were able to see Michigan from across the great lake! The Skydeck is the top floor of the Sears Tower (Now called the Willis Tower, as if Bruce decided to name the tower after himself.) which means that even with one of the fastest elevators in the world traveling up those 1000+ feet takes about a minute for a full trip. There's also this thing called the Skydeck Ledge where you go to the Skydeck and there's these little niches in the walls where you will walk out and find yourself in a glass box outside of the tower. As in, you look down at your feet and see the streets below. It's a huge hit now, and I tried going on. About one foot into the box I nearly collapsed screaming and had to huddle back on the carpet floor. I've had this crippling fear of heights ever since I was a little kid because my siblings would dangle me over the edges of high places and let go for a second before snatching me back up. Even though I knew they'd never truly let me fall, it still really instilled this huge sense that if I look over the edge of something I will actually fall. I have trouble looking over the railings in two-story malls it's that bad now.
So now I'm in Seattle. I absolutely love it here; there's coffee shops everywhere, the culture here is extremely liberal and happy and relaxing, there's a gorgeous blend of city and nature. It's just a fabulous place to go. I think my quote of the week is when my mom and I are walking on UW campus and this man runs up to us in a panic. Our initial reaction as introverted east coast people is to tense up, to which he responds, "Don't worry. I'm gay." As if that completely settles any worries. Turns out he's a janitor at the university. The fact that he was able to run up and pretty much announce to the world that he goes for men without any fear completely settles any worries I have about going to college here. I think this is my top choice.
Because this is such a long post, here's a little prettiness for you: THE SONG OF THE DAY IS "Nevermore" by Afro Celt Sound System!
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